Ketamine Treatment #1

1st Ketamine Treatment

The Experience

I was very nervous. I don’t like the feeling of disassociation, and I know this was a main effect. The nurse started me on a very low dose because of my concerns, and I’m glad she did this.

At first, I just felt “heavy”. Like my body weighed 3x what it did and was somehow being pushed into the chair. Then I started to get dizzy. This was much better with my eyes shut, so I kept them shut for the remainder of the session. Each time I’d open them, it was rather disorientating.

I don’t know how long it was before the full effects kicked in, but it felt like those early stages of waking up from anesthesia after surgery. I was connected to reality enough to know what was going on, while also losing concepts of time and special awareness. That’s the best way I can describe it. Almost like when you’re half asleep.

I was a little “out of it” after the session for the rest of the night, which is to be expected. I did have some random exaggerated muscle jerks over the night, as well. Even while I was asleep. I woke up a few times from dreams because I had jerked myself awake. From what I read, this can also be normal.

Going Forward

I didn’t hate it, but I didn’t enjoy it, either. I’m hoping that my nervousness about it affected my experience, and possibly the next session will be more enjoyable. I’m willing to give it one more try before I decide about the future.